We run into it all the time – shopping malls, busy roadways – people are in a hurry to be everywhere all at once. It is easy to get caught up in the bah humbug of it all, but what if there was another choice?
Let’s use bad drivers as an example, since we’ve all dealt with a special driver or two in our lives.
How often does being annoyed solve the problem that caused it?
Even if you were willing, able and it was legal for you to do something about it, being annoyed still doesn’t solve one bit of the problem. Being in a calm state is the best way to handle any issue; except of course, panic might give you more adrenaline should you find the need to outrun a polar bear or mountain lion. When dealing with bad drivers, it is not realistic to get out of your car and have a nice chat about proper driving etiquette with the jerk who cut you off; however you can select to not let their bad driving put a pot hole in the middle of your day.
The true source of annoyance comes from within one’s self. If you don’t care, it does not matter. If you choose to accept that the other driver sucks, but you are unable to control other people’s driving methods, the annoyance seeps away, leaving you in much better spirits.
Does the bad driver care that you are annoyed?
Probably not. It is even more probable that the bad driver is completely clueless and doesn’t even realize he annoyed you. That leaves you sitting in a big pile of angry fist shaking all by yourself.
How often do you feel irritated, tensed up and stressed when you are annoyed?
I haven’t conducted any surveys, but since being irritated, tense and stressed are the typical physical and emotional responses to the mental state of being annoyed, it’s pretty safe to say 100% of the time.
Where does all this leave you?
In a big pile of bah humbug, either by yourself or with your closest loved ones who are fortunate enough to hear you bitch about something completely out of anyone’s control.
Are there alternative solutions?
Let’s face it, it is only natural to get your hair raised when somebody else’s poor behavior affects you. If you are unable to communicate maturely and effectively with that person, the only person your annoyance is hurting is you and any of your loved ones “fortunate” enough to be near by.
Annoyance snowballs into an avalanche. Next time you are annoyed, notice how easily you become annoyed at other things. Next, try letting it go as quickly as you can. What you are going to find is, annoyance is sticky and collects more annoyance. The quicker you can drop it, the quicker you’re back to being like that happy jolly guy in the red suit instead of the angry green one who kicks his dog.
Returning to a calm state is a personal journey; however you might try:
- Taking a really deep breath and exhaling.
- Making a joke about the event or the person with the bad behavior. It is much more fun to giggle than be angry or annoyed.
- Say the word, “Squirrel!” really fast and then move onto a different thought.
- If someone is with you, take the time to brag about how you single handedly saved both your lives using your keen awareness and deft driving maneuvers.
Happy holidays. I hope you’ll comment on how you keep from being annoyed, so it can help others.